The United Kingdom Breeds Stupidity.

 

Ah that was a nice break, so it's time once again for some profile reviews!  To start off with I decided instead of focusing on one, I would set my targets on 2 short profiles!  Both of these people have 2 things in common, firstly, they are from the UK, and secondly, though they are from one of the countries the spawned English… none of them seem to be able to speak it… which is usually the case it seems.

The failure of the English Language.

 

Ah, had a nice cool down from all of last night's writing, thus it's time to start up again!  I have my wine, my music, some cancer sticks, and self glorified ignorance in hand.  Let the show being!  Speaking of self glorified ignorance, our next contestant is the definition of such, that or delusions of grandeur… I haven't quite decided yet, so as always I will let you the viewers be the judge.  Everyone… meet… THE EMO GOD!  Or as I like to call him, "Emo Pose"… as that seems to be his only skill with a camera.

The polite vampire?

 

Seems that these days people are getting a wee bit more intelligent about what they put in the public eye, this of course makes my job all the much more difficult ( and annoying ) to find a good target for your enjoyment.  Though in this case, I do believe I've found a gold mine of human stupidity.   As many of you more than likely realize, the "Twilight" book/movie has opened the eyes of Americas youth to the idea of just how peachy-fucking-keen "vampires" are.  Though as many of you also know, this is a sect of annoying little snot-cunts that actually believe, they are vampires.  Is this new?  Of course not, has it become rampant?  Much like the inbreeding West Virginians, yes.

Horse Boy the Emo Fag

 

Well last week's profile review was a roaring success ( as I expected of course ), so I do believe it's time to move on to our next little douche-canoe.  Today's winner is "Chaotic Chris", which from what I have seen translates to "I still live with mommy and daddy".   He is of course, emo… and has that same oddly shaped face/nose that EVERY single emo kid seems to have.  Seriously people, is that one of the requirements to acceptance in the emo culture?  Looking like a malnourished horse with a hair-cut ala weed-whacker wielding meth addict completed by a facial structure that somehow gravity forgot?

Simmi the Emo Terrorist!

 

Be it by email, via comment, or just a lovingly crafted message over AIM, people just LOVE to give me their opinions… regardless of my obviously apathetic stance regarding anything related to them.  Though sometimes the email/comment/etc is just too good to keep all to myself, I must share it with the world!  Tis my job… that and drinking profusely… and occasionally lighting transvestite street walkers on fire… ok I have a lot of jobs.

Lucid's Cock

...oh god.

Smacky Slut The Horse Faced Drag Queen.

 

Ah yes, P2K is back in business… feels good eh?  Like a screaming orgasm upon the back of a… hell I don't know, llama?  Sure, why not.  Though we all know it just wouldn't be phreak without the time honored tradition of pointing out those that should have been aborted via some type of incendiary device.  So please welcome, the first of many, the heroine addicted… DanielEllyot!

Hot Boxin' Phelps

 

So, the first "African American" President has been elected, we are in a horrific state economically, the price of gas is about to soar again, yet what is buzzing in the new world at the moment?  Phelps smoking weed.  Some famous guy, was caught, smoking weed.  Seriously, this is news people?  Bet you if it was some rapper it would be dismissed in a heartbeat… which of course proves, you're all racist.  You are all a bunch of fucking hypocrites.

Of In-Game Relationships.

 

Being that I have at one point played just about every online game the world has to offer ( Aside from a few Korean grinders and useless pieces of garbage such as Dark Age of Camelot ), I have come across at least once, just about every social stigma this piece of culture has to offer.  One of the more annoying, as well as utterly pathetic is the in-game relationships, but furthermore, the in-game marriages.

DeMMORPG: Star Wars: Galaxies

This isn't really a review, as I played this game a very long time ago, and promptly attempted a cry-for-help suicide directly after playing it for about... 20 minutes.  But never the less, my thoughts of SW:G! [14:08] goat: BRB, gonna find my SW:G install discs [14:08] Lucid: o.0 [14:08] Lucid: Unless you plan on burning them.. [14:08] Lucid: And pissing on the ashes. [14:08] Lucid: Then feeding the piss ashes to a homeless nazi... [14:08] Lucid: Why the fuck would you look for something like that? Done, and done.

The Douche Bag Brigade!

 

As you know by now, I have been going back and forth with a middle aged metal head on Vampire Freaks who just so happens to be foreign.  Now while this person is completely capable of speaking broken English ( at the very least ), he refuses to. After basically just calling him a lost cause, much like his ability to be a father, I just pursued other ventures, as you've undoubtedly noticed.  Over the time I have been pursuing said ventures, Mr. Douchebag666 has recruited himself a small army of likeminded ass-hats to the cause of bitching to me in Dutch.  Well an old friend of mine from Endless Ages just so happens to understand what the hell these kids are babbling at me, let's take a look shall we?

Double-Chinned Brazilian Fruit Cake Anyone?

 

Now we all know that the magical and mystical fruit-cake is a gift given near the holidays to those you really don't give a quarter of a flaming rat's ass about.  No-one knows what it's of, why it was made in the first place, or who the hell likes it enough to actually put it in their mouth.  You just end up throwing it in a random closet for it to gather dust, and then eventually pass it on to the next poor soul that will do the same.  The same is really no different here, aside from the fact that this one can speak… which in all honesty makes it the Anti-Christ of all fruit cakes everywhere. Now before I lay into this it ( yes I am going to use the term "it" again as I feel that if someone can't be happy with the gender they were born they need to be shot ), I would honestly like to state, I don't understand this new sub-culture of kids.  Maybe I'm just getting old, who knows, regardless it makes no sense to me.  Back in the day, it took intelligence, talent, or just a metric fuck-ton of money to make music, and get thousands of screaming followers that couldn't lead their own lives if their precious MAC eyeliner was at stake.  Now, apparently all you have to be is the following:

Of “tl;dr” and other youthful retardations.

 

Have any of you seen someone type this? "tl;dr"?  I personally have, more often than ever these days.  I honestly had no idea this thing stood for something.  In fact, for the longest time I was under the assumption that it was an improperly parsed Unicode character. ( Look it up kids, it's far too late in the evening to be explaining anything remotely resembling programmatic logic. )  At any rate, I decided to Google it today, and damn my eyes, it's another acronym!  As if we don't already have enough of that garbage floating around the internet, leave it to this new generation of socially retarded simian cluster fucks to come up with something like this.

Jeffree Star: The Emo Drag-Queen

 

So I apparently have been living under a rock, or haven't had the inclination to care about random internet drag queens.  Regardless of the reason, I have just recently learned of the internet celebrity; "Jeffree Star".  I first saw this person on Stickam while talking to Infected a while back, sitting there on the main page doing some random show and being… well, a drag queen like nothing I have ever seen.  Thinking it was just some random dolt, I moved on to other things in my evening.  But as of late I keep hearing about this atrocity to man-kind all over the drama-wagon.  ( Live Journal, MySpace, so on, so forth ).  After doing a little digging I have come to realize that not only is this walking advertisement for colored sharpies some type of icon for emo faggots everywhere, but actually has a band!  That's right, a band… though I am using the term loosely as the "music" it creates basically sounds like a random drag-queen saying random idiocies into a mic while banging random keys on a Casio keyboard from 1986… oh wait, that's exactly what it is.  I'd rather listen to the Lion King sound-track on repeat while continuously driving shards of glass into my crotch than subject myself to more than 3 seconds of this garbage.

That movie was just plain shit.

  I just got done watching Dragon Wars. Watching.  I watched it.  Previously engaged in attempting to understand what I was visually seeing. … that's the problem … I got through that whole fucking movie and STILL have no clue A) What was going on, and B) Why it was going on, and 3) the reason for the Dragons in the first place. I can only surmise that at some point, had I known more then just the English Language, there was an explanation in Korean or Dragonese or some other such language.  Here's the problem:

Pure Douchebag: Revisited.

 

Being that I rarely actually log into Vampire Freaks, I am usually a little behind the times on when people are speaking to me. ( Read: Being blithering idiots in languages I don't understand. )  I apparently struck a deep enough nerve with our friend thedouche bag for him to leave not one, but three comments, as well as a friend of his sending me a private message.  Firstly, I am using a translator to read what this idiot is attempting to say, so don't bother picking apart my translations… blame altavista.

DeMMORPG: Final Fantasy: Online - Day One - Final Chapter

 

Now understand, this short little ditty is coming from a huge fan of the Final Fantasy series.  I have rarely been disappointed by ANYTHING Square has released in the past.  The other night while looking for Mortal Combat: Deception for Infected, I noticed a $1.99 30 day trial of Final Fantasy: Online.  I had never played it before, I figured hell, why not, it's only 2 bucks.  I eagerly install, and wait another 2 hours for patching.  As you already know, patching right after installing seriously gets under my skin… and by "gets under my skin" I mean, makes me want to beat a panda to death. After taking a shower, smoking a lot of cigarettes, and drinking copious amounts of wine, the install finally finishes, and I am on my excited little way…

Of Fashion Lulz

Now, I'm not one to critique fashion. Primarily because I'm a "throw it on, if it looks decent, run with it" kind of person. And I'm comfortable with that... But, when it comes to people that actually care about how they look, and they do ridiculous things...I can't help but say something.   I was talking with my girlfriend and she was poking around on this website 'Frederick's'. She showed me some shoes, which looked nice. A nice hat. I was impressed with the site...but, as with so many things, it wasn't to last. She shopped around a bit more and discovered some rather disturbing "body enhancers".  Yes, that's right. Foam asscheeks for that flat-bottomed girl in your life. I can just see how such a gift would go over. Or even just getting your groove on and the girl pulls down her pants all seductively, then turns around and...yep. Egg crate buttocks. But it doesn't end there. Then this metaphorical honey strips off her shirt and bra and SURPRISE! SYNTHETIC TITS! And not even the good ones that are on the inside, either. Yeah, you're getting all hot and bothered now, aren't you? Suddenly this bombshell you picked up is running on $250 of fake jiggly fun parts. I wish it ended there, but she also discovered something that nearly twisted my brain like a wet gym towel. I wish I was kidding when I said that there was such a thing as an ass bra. For those women with that are saggin' in their wagon. Men, do yourselves a favor and never buy any of these things for your women. And if you meet someone w [...]

DeMMORPG: Lord of the Rings: Online - Day Three - Final Chapter

So I played "Monster Play" for about 1 hour tonight.  I really have nothing left to say about Lord of the Rings: Online after learning that PVP in this game is consensual. Monster play is essentially just an instance of pre-created characters that you can upgrade here and there.  Boring button mashing.  Nothing more, nothing less.  Fail. Now on to my overall review of LoTR:O. 

Graphics:  The graphics here are good, nothing to rant and rave about, but above par at the least.  Very pretty landscapes, ok texturing, nice animations on most objects. Really no complaints on this front.

Engine:  When I say engine, I mostly mean memory usage, network latency, visual lag, things of this nature.  I was impressed, they make very good use of memory and not once did I ever get disconnected.  Good code, good servers.  A+ here.

Sound: I did like the sound effects, though the human sounds like a fag more times than not when being hit.  The music is fitting to the scenes and the time era.  No complaints here.

Game Play:  It's your basic button mashing MMO, nothing out of the blue here.  Fight, mash some buttons, loot, sell, get a new [...]

DeMMORPG: Lord of the Rings: Online - Day Two

 

So after spending 3 hours to get from level 7 to level 10, I have reached the ability to play the famed "Monster Play" portion of Lord of the Rings: Online.  But I will get to that in a later article.  This one will be for day two of playing my little emo-champion. There really isn't that much to say since last night in all honesty.  Quest, kill, return, get new quest, kill, return, so on, so forth.  Your average run of the mill grinder as it were.  I suppose the only difference is that the quests have become slightly more difficult and I have been forced to group with people if I want to complete some of them.  Which as I said last night, IS OBSCENLY ANNOYING.  I don't mind people, most of the time, but most of the time people are so stupid that I am constantly amazed at the fact they were able to turn on their computer, let alone get into an online game. This is going to be pretty short and sweet,  as like I said, not much has really changed… ONWARD! ( In no particular order )  

Of Tyler Perry Bullshit And Dodging Misinterpretation

I was going to post this yesterday, but it was April Fool's Day and no one can take anything you fucking say seriously. So, here's what I was going to post:   Dear Tyler Perry, Just fucking retire already. Your friends, Honkeys.     I mean, honestly. Tyler Perry. Let's be honest with one another. Every movie, every television show, every cartoon you have ever done or had any say in is exactly the same. As if naming them different things is somehow going to miraculously trick people into watching it (and, really, I have to assume that this is the case because you're still fucking employed). I went into my local Family Video store and glanced around, looking for some Hollywood scrap that I can forcefeed into my DVD player. The problem here is that I've seen every movie that appeals to me, or that doesn't but was introduced to me and I enjoyed it (I'm looking at you, Across The Universe and Requiem For A Dream). But that's neither here nor there. On my quest of futility I had to overcome hurdles. Hurdles of forced silence and strenuous grimacing. You see, every seventh movie on the wall was a Tyler Perry mind-shit. Tyler Perry's House of Payne season whogivesafuck, Tyler Perry's Why I Got Married And Became A Generic Movie Black Man That Isn't Comedic Relief, Tyler Perry's Tyler Perry Dresses Like An Elderly Woman For The Sixty-Fourth Time. Christ, man. I get it. I don't know if they get it, but I get it. You're black and come from a black family and you are inspired by the blackness of your family and you absolutely must makeseven thousand productions a year or we might forget that you're black. Maybe I should start producing films with a two-hundred thousand dollar budget. About fifth-or-sixth generation Polish people. Who live in a state where the economy and job market are deader than your imagination and view on the world. [...]

DeMMORPG: Lord of the Rings: Online - Day One

 

So after waiting an obscenely long time to actually get into the game. ( Read: After having to download gigs upon gigs… then patch… as Turbine seems to be unable to actually, I don't know, update their base installation ) I have finally joined the world of "Lord of the Rings: Online".  Not a bad game, not a good game either.  Thus far, it's just, a game.  Then again in this world of online gaming how can any one company stand out from the other.  Not very many options unless you want to steer away from your typical hack and slash genre and well… fail to get a customer base.  Seems that games that hit ideas that are off the map of general cookie cutter ideas fail these days.  But enough of my view on the current online gaming industry, let's get into the good, the bad, and the ugly shall we?  

DeMMORPG: Lord of the Rings: Online

First thought: After downloading the client for LoTR:O... which took about 3 hours.  Is it that fucking difficult for a large scale gaming company to at least update their installer so I dont have to download another 2 hours worth of patches? More when I actually... get in the damn game.

Because bitching about games is just as fun sometimes.

Taking a little break from writing about morons for a bit here, and spending some time in my second most favorite pass-time;  Gaming.  No worries, I'm sure between Goat, Infected, and Enmity there will be plenty of good reading to feed your need to hear about the socially retarded.  With this change in writing, a new category is born; DeMMORPG Review.  Yes, it would be the result of the word "Demo" and term "MMORPG" screwing and having an illegitimate child.

Stay tuned kids, it started tonight with the 7 Day trial of "Lord of the Rings: Online".

...Whenever this damn download gets done.

Of Karma Brought Down On The Wicked And Whorish

  http://www.realpics.net/Ashnooob http://www.myspace.com/ashnoob (set to private, but you get a nice look of her tool of a boyfriend) Now, this particular subject today hits a little close to home. I actually know this person and dislike them for their actions, rather than being an idiot on community websites. Regardless of that, I feel no remorse in setting my sights on this little harlot.

Of Jim Davis' Overstayed Welcome

...someone really had to. No one really cares anymore.

Of Wikipedia Worthiness

Now, as several of my friends are aware, I am something of a Wikipedia enthusiast. Something of a wayward adventurer of the vast, untapped knowledge that lies dormant and, for the most part, unappreciated. I can't help but click a link on that page, perhaps, two, which eventually leads me to click two or three on these two new pages. It's a chain reaction that I like to call 'falling into Wikipedia'.   On one such adventure into information vertigo, I happened upon a number of pages, all of which that were on the same web of related topics (although this means little to anyone who has fallen into Wikipedia, as some webs can go from Mother Theresa, to Van Halen, to the seventeenth century practice of rubbing the shredded skins of animals on underage children in some obscure, haphazard fashion). This web was around 50%-70% removed or 'recommended for speedy deletion' by the populace of Wikipedia. The 'Wikipedia regulars', if you would. A community of men with wells of infinite knowledge, one would assume, though it's quickly discovered that they are, in fact, just regular joes that know their way around a Google. This web of related articles was, from what I could surmise from the 'discussion' tab, being metaphorically curbstomped (think American History X, given the speed in which it was being destroyed) because of the lack of content elsewhere on the internet. I shrugged it off, not really thinking about it, though being a little irritated that I had actually, for the first time in my Wikipedia informational adventures, hit a road block. Some time passed and I once again fell into Wikipedia's grasp, one that I wish most educational systems could harness and use on today's youth, and slowly started to discover yet another web being set aflame by rabble rousing information junkies. The reason, again only roughly guessed at given the fractured form of communication that is the 'discussion' tabs of these articles, was because the arti [...]

Miss Piggy the Hacker

 

Does anyone remember, way back when, more than likely before most of our readers' time, when the internet was a place of technological intelligence?  Hell, remember the days before the internet?  Amber and black terminals, analog couplers, dial in bulletin board systems.  The days of door games, when text files were considered "warez", and hacking had a little bit of respect behind the term?  Ah, those were the days.  When it took a truly intelligent person to get "online".  Now days anything with a credit card and an affliction to further spread their stupidity through-out the world can get online and act as if they invented the computer themselves.  Tools have been made to allow people to track down the most intimate details about a human being, whenever they want.

Corey Feldman's On Gorgeous Geeks...And Is A Woman?

  http://www.gorgeousgamers.com/users/resoc9p2 I'd like to start out that this is my first visit, so this may be more of a review of my overall impression of the site than the fucksmack I linked above.

Look Mommy! I'm a failure!

 

Firstly, I'd like to openly state that I usually never attack someone under the age of eighteen.  For some reason it just gives me the shivers.  Then again, someone of the sort has never actually attempted to start a little war, so I suppose there is always a first time for everything.  Why not, we all know that I'm going to hell anyways, why not secure a front row seat for Armageddon?

Beating a dead horse... I mean whale.

  The shit that I really didn't want to tear into just yet... Why? Well because I didn't really give a rat's ass about the whole ordeal until I stumbled upon this piece of trash.    Hell go a head and read the whole post if you wish to. Shamangirl "Lastly, one of his recent posts makes me wonder if he plans to degrade everyone's favorite Goth girl, triplesix. If so he's really looking for a whole world of hurt." 

More fun with Shaman Girl

  Now... I do have moments of compassion, though they are rare. But I read a post by ShamanGirl and felt inclined to respond with a comment that was slightly less of a flame. Maybe I'm going soft? Anyways, she has her comments screened so I don't know if it will actually make it to her journal or not so I'm posting it here.

Pure Douchebag 666

 

VF never ceases to grace me with its ability to attract the strangest and most chemically unbalanced people.  Then again, it's a profile rating site based off the ideas of a mythical and magical creature, like God, Satan, or Obama Bin Laden… wait, did I say Obama?  Shit.  Though in this case, the apparently contagious ailment delusional retardation does not discriminate age.  Wait, never mind, I knew that already… Nebris and his Land Whale proved that point quite expertly.

The life support ANYONE would turn down.

 

Being that finding idiotic people of the female gender in the goth/industrial "scene" is a bit like shoot fish in a barrel… the size of a shot glass.  I've decided to switch it up a bit and have a go at a guy.  Which I use that as a very loose generalization, as it took me a few times to figure out what the real gender of this kid was, believe me, being that this pictures are so 'shopped, it's a task in it of itself to distinguish whether or not which bits existed down stairs… if any at all.  

Canadian Wiggers Do Exist!

  This is a prime specimen of how the Rap / Hip Hop lifestyle affects white people. I present to you: TrickTrick from Nexopia. First off, let us start with the catch-line that caught my attention:

Oh to be a part of the ASSHOLE Cult

  The main reason that I have made this post is to direct your attention to a "cult" on a site that is called ASSHOLE. I am sure that many of you that visit P2K will find this to be entertaining. I really have nothing to say about this here "cult" (apparently they weren't "goth" enough already), since it pretty much speaks for it's self.  If you feel like joining in on Vampirefreaks.com and enter the cult, you will shortly see why I have made a post on this little gold mine.  

Of Fox Fetishes

Ahh. Now that I'm taking a break from shooting the fattest fish in the barrel, I'm going to aim between the bits of gray scales and chunks of smelly, crisco-coated flesh and go for the not-so-rare goth fish. The...Vampire Freak. Hello, Sanfox. I'm looking at you.   Now, at first glance I didn't think this fine specimen of humanity would be worth a review. Hell, I nearly clicked the X and gave up right away. Ahh, but then I mistakenly looked beneath the photo of the fox you have as your main picture and started to take in a bit of your profile...and began to salivate.   Sex: male  Yes, male, which I doubted at first, given the huge love for foxes and the blindingly enormous amount of banners and pictures a few inches down your profile. Age: 26  Location: fuck you, a crappy pad somewhere, New Zealand  You're asked your location and the first thing you say is 'fuck you'. You're trying to sound like a hardass...in your Location. This should be fannnnnntastic. Rating: 8.82  Rating points: 864 Now I'm not fluent in Vampire Freaks' little rating system, but I am fairly certain that that 8.82 is out of ten. This just proves that you don't even have to show pictures of your ugly ass to be rated above average on Vampire Freaks. All in all, ratings mean nothing on this site, and this fox fucker just proved it. Blah, blah blah, come to the Occupation: sociapath of unwarranted notoriety and I can't help but snicker. Let me make you all aware that this happens to be a blanket term for a number of disorders. This pissant is probably too busy googling pictures of foxes (yeah, we all know you didn't take these pictures, fuckstain, otherwise you'd have something up of your ugly ass trying to look cool with ICP makeup on) to know this, so I'm going to help out [...]

Of goth girls and Delusions of Grandeur

With the tune of Tech N9ne in the background, I do believe it's time to move on to my next interest of misogynistic amusement.  Before I go full throttle into this next complete piece of human excrement, allow me to give a short, but sweet, introduction as to how this little twat fell into my gaze.  As some of you know, I at times wear synthetic hair.  As a great few of you know, Infected ( an author of P2K ) happens to make said synthetic hair, or dreads, to be overly technical. 

Some time ago, Infected, who I will now call GI, for the purpose of saving my fingers decided that it would be a rather good idea to go into business selling said dreads, as her work is top notch and by all means the best that has ever graced the noggin I call my cranium.  She made a flyer for said services, and as most corporate businesses used stock photo found around the internet to display, and explain what said dreads can look like.  Well, as to be expected, in such a small industry, there were those that would do all they could to pick apart the most asinine aspect of said fliers.  Basically, new competition is not welcome.  Everything from pictures, to attitude, to prices was heavily scrutinized.

Well, now it's my turn to scrutinize.  My first target? Lorelei.

Lorelei, or cunt as I shall refer to her from here [...]

Ahhh, Goat Mail

  My first reply since P2K has been back up. Ahh, this should be fun. And surprise, it's from one of nebris' whores.

LJ Strike, In Closing

 

Well, as expected, the so called Live Journal strike, or being that well, they aren't paid to use live journal in the first place it should be called boycott, did absolutely nothing more than clean off peoples friends page of relentless, pointless rambling for a 24 hour period.  Which, by that right I suppose isn't that bad of a thing… but all together pointless in the long run.  Though I found it fun that some people actually went with the counter strike idea, I relished in the readings of a couple hundred posts just for the pure pleasure of a second point being made.  Phreak2000 personally thanks you for your efforts of expunging the lapse logic of confused little boys a girls of the online world.

Quoting intelligent men does not make you intelligent

  With the introduction of 'nebris' into the metaphorical Phreak2000 wolf pen, I have to sit here and think of who he reminds me of. Oh, that's right. Everyone.

Pope Taste Good

   I'm going to take a guess and say he tastes like chicken. Unless he ate Pope John Paul, in which case it's probably more like jerky.  Remember, fuckspoon's soon-to-be official home is at http://www.fuckspoon.com !

Happy Egg Coloring Day

  Posted here a little late, but hey. I realize that many P2Kers don't know or remember fuckspoon, so go ahead and check here for a refesher or just an introduction. Visit the soon-to-be new home for fuckspoon (though only one of a few posting places) at http://www.fuckspoon.com/ !

Shower? Anyone?

"It is hostile little shits like this that are a prefect example of what ultimately led me to the concept of Outbreeding The Male. He seems like just a 'kid with issues', but give him Power and a uniform and he'd gladly send any one of you to the showers."  - nebris Rub-A-Dub-Dub Kiddies... dont forget behind the ears!

Of CG and Girlscouts

(11:16:16 PM) Luke: DUDE! (11:16:25 PM) Luke: I figured out a new way to do sacrifices today (11:16:43 PM) Luke: Kill the Virgin Girlscout, eat her cookies. (11:16:58 PM) Luke: 1) End up with a happy god. 2) End up with cookies. (11:17:08 PM) Luke: \o/

It's a witch... BURN IT!

 

Well it seems I might have struck a nerve with someone in the Live Journal community… whodathunkit?  This saddens me greatly. ( Read: Gives me a big ole fashion stiffy )  Then again, those of you that remember the old days, I am no stranger to the ability to peck-a-fight. ( Yes, I meant peck, not pick, if you don't get the reference, watch better movies )  I'm going to classify this one in the mail-bag, even though it's a Live Journal comment.

Live Journal Counter Strike

 

If you have been around the internet for at least 10 seconds, you will have heard of Live Journal, if you haven't, allow me to enlighten you about this little "gem" of a system.  Live Journal, in essence is a way for people with far too much time on their hands to bitch and whine about their pathetic little lives in a medium where everyone acts like they give a half of a rats ass for the purpose of getting someone else to read THEIR useless diatribe about their pathetic lives.  Basically, it's the largest system of sycophantic fair-weather friends on the planet…  next to MySpace… of course. 

Of English Insignificants

  Let me start by saying that I do realize that several, if not MOST English majors became English majors because they have a talent and passion for writing itself. I am aware, do not flood my e-mail telling me that you are some 'exception' to the rant that is to follow, because I'll just laugh at you for not paying attention.

Acerbic Insanity: Part... hell I dont know at this point.

  Ah the first full article for the re-incarnation of P2K so I figured let's start this off with a little bit of my favorite pass-time.  Ranting and gaming. To give you a little pre-history to the following article, I used to work for a company called Avaria, which was later rename to X-Src, which was later bought by Rapid Reality, which Rapid Reality later trashed our game, fucked up the models, forced me to lie to its community at every turn, released a piece of shit called Phylon, pulled the Phylon servers offline, and walked with people's money without any explanation.  This mostly to the fault of two bible thumping hapless artists that took over the company and decided to make decisions that everyone basically knew were going to push the company into a nice comfy state of "What do you mean the IRS requires us to pay taxes?",  so on and so forth.  

Of The Cake

Contrary to popular belief, the alleged 'moist and delicious cake' is, according to recent reports from valid and anonymous sources, neither of the advertised adjectives. Indeed, according to these sources in information given via e-mail, the cake is neither moist or delicious. It is unknown at this time how or when exactly this discovery was made, however efforts are being put forth to investigate this as well as the validity of related subjects such as 'pie' and 'donut'. To put it simply, ladies and gentlemen, the cake...is a lie.

Bring out your dead!

Over the next few days I will be bringing over all of the old content from the previous version of Phreak2000.Com, some oldies, some new…ies.. baddies, goodies, so on, so forth.  Most of this means little to most of you unless you happen to be on my live journal friends list, in which case that means that your friends page is going to be filled with post after post after post of me updating Phreak.  ( As now every time I post to phreak, it now mirrors on LJ, as well as a few other sites.

Don't worry… its only 8 pages of content.

moo

mmooo